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Love is a many-splendored thing, especially when you’re gawking at it from the outside. In this column, we’ll be examining the celebrity couples that give us hope for our own romantic futures and trying to learn what we can from their well-documented bonds. If there is one thing I truly love in this world, it’s a surprise wedding. Go off! Elope! Tie the knot in a chill, romantic, fun way that does not require me to spend half my monthly rent on a blender! (Just kidding: if you’re my friend and you’re eloping, I’m still getting you a present—and in fact, you’ll get a much finer class of gift in exchange for not making me wear heels.) It seems the latest celebrity couple to tie the knot in an impromptu fashion is Taika Waititi and Rita Ora, who, according to multiple reports, recently married “in an intimate ceremony in London.” Chic!
“A big, showbiz-style bash is planned to celebrate, but don’t expect to see it being flogged to the highest-bidding magazine,” an unnamed source (hmm) told The Sun of the Waititi-Ora nuptials, and while I respect the couple’s privacy, I also kind of want them to flog their big wedding to the highest-bidding magazine, because I have a feeling these two would throw a hell of a party. I knew I was a fan of the Waititi-Ora relationship when I saw that the two got engaged in almost “simultaneous” proposals. This is extreme lesbian energy—said with deep respect—and honestly, not since the pair’s brief entanglement with Tessa Thompson have I respected them so much. While making out with Tessa Thompson is always a laudatory achievement, what I really liked about the Taika-Rita-Tessa kiss was Taika’s response: “I think in the world of the internet, everything goes away pretty quick. And also, is it that big a deal? No, not really. I was doing nothing wrong. It’s fine.” He basically told us all to get a life, and honestly, we deserved it. (I would be remiss if I didn’t mention that Ora was forced to come out as bi after she received heat online for her song “Girls,” and we really should have left her alone after that. Let people kiss whatever consenting adults they want to kiss!) The newly minted Waititi-Oras made their debut as a couple in August of last year, and yes, they are the kind of celebrity couple that will publicly wish each other a happy Valentine’s Day, but—if this is possible—they’ve found a way to do so in a reasonably non-corny way. Once I saw pictures of Waititi holding the train of Ora’s dress at the Vanity Fair Oscar party in 2022, I knew that good vibes abounded. Mazel to the happy couple!
Also, doing this work doesn’t need to look like going to nursing school to be an abortion provider or becoming a public defender to work with criminalized pregnant people or putting your body on the line as a clinic escort (though we need folks to be doing all of these, for sure). It’s often mundane, quiet, unglamorous: a recurring donation to your local abortion fund, driving someone to the airport, putting together a care package of heating pads and ginger ale and saltines. Just as abortion itself is not inherently traumatic or complicated (though of course, it can be), being actively pro-abortion and caring for your community will not always feel public and big and gratifying in the way a thousand likes on a social media post will. It will involve lots of time spent reading, learning, questioning, thinking. It will involve messing up and not always being able to show up for someone in the ways you wish you could and having deeply uncomfortable or ugly conversations with people in your life (even if they consider themselves to be pro-choice). It’s not as simple as a bumper sticker or an Instagram post. And if you’re white, cis, able-bodied, or living in a high-access state with socioeconomic privilege and access to safe reproductive care, it will involve a lot more following than leading.
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